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Chapter Nineteen - Chapter Nineteen

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Doctor on Call

Chris choked at the stench under his nose.

'I'm sorry I ever ran away!' he gasped and clutched Innocet's arm. His head swam and finally settled. He was sitting on the floor, his back propped against a wall under the portrait.

Innocet showed him a little green bottle. 'Attar of asafoetida,' she said. 'Most effective.' Her brown bonnet and the huge, coiled mound of hair under her cloak reminded him of Terrapin-Maiden in the FreakWarrior Vidmags he'd watched as a kid.

'I wouldn't argue with that,' he said. His head was suddenly crystal clear, but so were the grumbles and creaks of the restless House. 'I wish this place would shut up.'

'Your arrival was enough to set off all the bad echoes in the place.'

Chris closed his eyes and breathed deeply. 'What sort of echoes?'

'Old thoughts, bad memories.'

'Dreams?'

'That's one word for them,' she said firmly. 'Some echoes bang around inside the walls for ever. They get magnified and exaggerated.'

'Maybe.' Chris studied the floor. 'I've had a lot of bad dreams lately. But it's got worse here. I don't even have to be asleep. They don't even feel like my dreams. I've tried talking to the Doctor, but he's either too preoccupied or he doesn't want to know.'

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'It's odd,' she agreed. 'If anyone was a target for the echoes here, I would have said it was him.'

And they're his dreams, thought Chris. I know they are. 'How does he do it? How does he carry on regardless?'

'He always has done,' she said.

He hauled himself unsteadily to his feet and looked again at the Family portrait. 'The old guy here. Was that really the Doctor?'

She nodded. 'In his first life, yes. Housekeeper Satthralope forbade his name in the House when he was disinherited.'

'Goddess, that was cruel,' said Chris.

'He was more than able to fight back. That's why they hated him so much.' Innocet ran a finger along the base of the picture frame, studied the dust for a moment and dabbed it into her mouth. 'Where did you meet him?'

Chris blethered. 'Oh, a long way ago. A long time from here.' Hell, he thought. Past or future? What do I tell his own Family? 'He's a good friend,' he said and scanned the ancient room with its worn and oversized furniture. 'How old is this House?'

She seemed surprised. 'As old as any. Don't you come from one of the Houses?'

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There was that piercing look again as if she was trying to read the pages of his mind, but had the book upside down. 'Um ... not a home like this,' he said, awkwardly breaking her stare.

She walked into the centre of the room. 'There's so much we will have to learn when we get out. They say the Houses are the oldest living things in the world. The first ones were grown during the Intuitive Revelation. They certainly feel as if they've been here forever.'

'I don't believe he killed Quences,' Chris affirmed. 'Or Arkhew for that matter.'

She nodded her eyes towards a mirror at the far end of the room. 'My goodness!' She affected a laugh. 'What a lot Quences will have to talk about when he wakes up!'

Chris turned his back to the mirror and muttered, 'Who are you hiding this from? You can't hide it forever.'

'We could until now.' Her voice had darkened again. 'I can't vouch for the Doctor's safety. Not even from myself. Not if he interferes.'

'It's a bit late for that.'

She pulled in close to him. 'Have you been with him ever since you arrived?'

'Yes,' he said emphatically.

Damn, he thought. He left me on my own twice. Once in the attic and once in the funguretum. Either time he could have met Arkhew and\x85. Damn, damn, damn!

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'Listen, listen,' muttered Satthralope.

Glospin watched the old woman as she rocked slowly in her chair. 'You didn't say anything about Arkhew,' he said.

'It can wait.' She was turning the keys on their giant ring. One after another in a slow, steady rhythm.

They clicked on the wooden ring on her finger. 'Listen. Are you listening? You've been asleep.'

'What are you doing?' he said, although he already knew.

'It must be told,' she crooned. She was staring straight into the mirror. Rocking.

'Not yet.' He moved angrily towards her, but the Drudge blocked his path. 'No, not yet. Don't wake the House.'

She clinked another key round. Her voice was gentle, almost caressing. 'You must stay, Glospin. I'll need you. It may not listen.'

He turned to the Drudge. 'You stay. I'm not involved.'

As he ran for the door, he heard another key clink round.

The walls shuddered.

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'I heard you were back, Wormhole,' said Rynde.

He had waylaid the Doctor on a gallery above the Hall. The attendant Drudge reached for the Doctor's arm.

'I'm a guest,' the Doctor said. 'I'll talk to whom I like.'

'You won't like me,' Rynde said. 'But then you never did.' He walked slowly round the Doctor, admiring the little man's extraordinarily clean apparel. He tugged at the decorated scarf.

'That's mine, thank you.' The Doctor slapped his hand away.

'What else have you brought?'

'Nothing for the likes of you!' The Doctor shot a glance up at the Drudge. 'Oh, dear. You've all been put to a lot of inconvenience and you've had a lot of time to ruminate on the injustice. I'm. . . sorry.'

Rynde grabbed him by the collar. 'You will be.'

'I'm sorry I didn't come earlier, um ... Cousin Rynde, isn't it? I had plans.'

'So did we all! I was Epicural Overseer to the Dromeian Chapterhouse.'

'Ah,' choked the Doctor, 'head waiter.'

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'I was renowned for my skills at assembling banquets from the rarest provisions. Now all I eat is fungi and these.' He held up a couple of braces of scrawny tafelshrews. 'There's only a limited number of ways you can cook them. So I'd relish a change of menu.'

The Doctor looked uncomfortable. 'Where have all the others gone?'

'Away,' said Rynde.

The walls and floor shuddered. The Drudge raised its head as furniture along the gallery shuffled uncomfortably.

A sharp cry of pain came from an alcove.

'Who's your friend?' said the Doctor.

'Out you come, Owis,' Rynde called. He waited while his podgy Cousin sidled nervously into view.

'It bit me,' he said. 'The chair bit me.'

'Listen to me. We must wait.'

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Satthralope clung to her chair. Now that was rocking too. The mirrors trembled in their frames.

'You must wait. Now he's here, all this can be finished. We can wake Quences when we are ready. But stay calm. We must be calm.'

She felt the mood of the House tighten on her thoughts. She had been too quick. It was startled awake after a long, disturbed sleep. It dreamt the echoes that rattled along its cloisters and corridors.

'There, there. It'll soon be over. Stay calm. Stay calm. Nothing to worry about.'

The door slowly opened itself.

Across the entrance lay a shape. Half out of a sack, propped against the door frame. Its head lolled to one side. Eyes cold and staring. The twisted body of Cousin Arkhew.

Satthralope stared in disbelief. One of the mirrors turned on its hinges, straining to see.

'Nothing to look at!' the Housekeeper gasped.

The mirror cracked across.

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Owis gawped at the Doctor. 'Who is he?' he complained. 'What's going on? Why won't anyone tell me?'

'Ask him yourself,' said Rynde.

The Doctor was peering out of the gallery, up into the roof of the Hall. Something was hanging there, bulky, caught in the swags of web. He slid a catapult out of his pocket, noticed the Drudge and put it back again.

'Well,' said Owis, 'who are you, then?'

'Doctor!' shouted someone.

'Correct,' the Doctor said.

There were two figures on the gallery across the well of the Hall. Innocet and the young stranger. They started to move round.

A deep rumble began in the depths of the House. The furniture on the gallery started to edge out of its places. Chairs, tables, all stalking slowly towards the Doctor.

Rynde pulled Owis clear.

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The Drudge lunged at the Doctor. He stepped neatly to the side and reached into his jacket. Out of the flimsy garment, he drew an impossibly large umbrella. It opened over him like a huge coloured mushroom, hiding him from view. The Drudge knocked the object aside, but the Doctor had vanished.

The rumbling deepened.

'Behind you,' called the Doctor from the balustrade. He swung his legs over the balcony and shinned down one of the tree trunks into the Hall.

The Drudge leant over the edge and gave a creaking cry of anger.

The House answered with a shudder of disapproval.

Innocet and the stranger joined Rynde and Owis as they stared hopelessly down.

'What's he doing?' muttered Rynde.

The Doctor was walking the length of the long Hall, heading towards the Loom plinth where Quences was laid out.

'Stop him,' said Innocet. 'Satthralope must have woken the House.'

'Wormhole!' yelled Rynde. 'Get away from there. You'll get us all killed!'

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The Doctor turned and waved. 'Why? What is there to be scared of?' He stopped in his tracks as a gang of heavy dining tables began to edge out of the alcoves.

The Drudge croaked an order from the gallery, and the tables moved in closer.

The young stranger suddenly grabbed hold of the coloured umbrella. He shut it up and furled the material. 'Doctor,' he yelled and threw it down to the floor.

The Drudge rounded on the stranger, but Innocet moved between them with a sharp riposte. 'Stop this now! Remember the laws of Housepitality! ' The servant ignored her.

Down below, the Doctor snatched up the brolly and began to parry the prowling tables. The rumbling House shuddered again, almost throwing him to the floor.

Somewhere a door slammed. Then another. There was a barrage of rage as doors all over the House slammed themselves over and over. The helpless watchers covered their ears.

Through the din, Innocet shouted, 'Stay there, Chris! Only Satthralope can stop this nonsense!' As she hurried away, Chris's hand went to his forehead and his knees buckled. He rested his chin on the balustrade and groaned weakly as he watched the fight.

The tables were circling the Doctor, narrowing his space. Rynde saw that they would soon slide themselves together and crush him. He nudged Owis. 'Three tafelshrews that he loses a leg.'

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'Five, he loses both.' They crooked fingers.

The Doctor, his umbrella open as a shield, was spinning in a circle, trying to hold back all the tables at once.

One table made a vicious swipe and knocked the weapon out of his hand. As the mob closed in for the kill, the Doctor hop-toaded up on to one of the tabletops.

The table bucked and tried to throw him. It reversed and took a run across the Hall. The Doctor balanced on top, crouching, arms outstretched, shouting something like 'Surf's up!'

The table skidded to a halt and the Doctor tumbled clear.

Rynde whistled appreciatively. 'He never used to do that.'

Owis frowned. 'Have you met him before?'

The Drudge croaked another order. The slamming doors went suddenly quiet. The rumbling continued.

The Doctor waited for the other tables to advance, but they began to pull back.

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Something snorted. Out of the gloom beyond the plinth slid the guardian of Quences's resting place. The massive black catafalque dwarfed the Doctor. It lashed its segmented tail. The ebony statues of beasts stacked up its ornamental sides rolled their enamel eyes. Some beat their wings or stamped their hoofed feet.

The Doctor edged backward, but found his path blocked by the tables. He looked up to the galleries and whistled a two-note signal.

Chris tried to heave himself over the balustrade, but the Drudge dragged him roughly back.

The catafalque advanced, growling to itself. The ceremonial beasts carved on its flanks lowered their horns and tusks, ready for the charge.

The Doctor whistled again and this time there was a whistled response. He smiled to himself and the catafalque charged.

He dodged sideways. The funeral carriage lashed its tail round and caught him side-on. He stumbled and kept his balance, but his jacket was caught between the tail segments. Struggling to free himself, he was dragged steadily towards the affixed beasts as they writhed and champed from their places on the body of the bier.

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Innocet stepped over the body of Arkhew dumped in the doorway.

Satthralope was in her chair, staring at the corpse, making little guttural noises in her throat. Her keys lay on the floor at her feet.

Innocet closed the door quietly. She took the old woman's trembling hands. 'Satthralope, listen. The House...'

'I told it,' whispered the old woman.

'Yes.'

'It knows he's here.'

The House shuddered again. A tarnished shield fell from the wall and clanged spinning to the floor.

'We must stop it,' Innocet said.

'No, no. It won't listen.'

'It must listen,' Innocet insisted. She felt fresh tremors shiver through the floor. 'You can't do it alone.' She picked up the heavy keyring and placed it in the Housekeeper's hands. Together they turned to the reflection in the mirrors.

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To and fro thrashed the tail of the enraged catafalque. The Doctor, thrown about like a doll, was barely clinging on.

A sudden roar cut across the Hall. Rynde, in the midst of another wager with Owis, saw a shaggy figure emerge on to the arena.

'What's that?' Owis said.

'Badger!' shouted the Doctor, struggling to hold his grip. 'About time too! It's me!' He whistled again and the tall figure returned the signal. It was bulky, with massive curling horns on its head, but its striped fur was grubbier than Rynde remembered. Tufts of stuffing sprouted from tears in its side. One crystal eye dangled out of its socket.

The black bier turned towards the intruder. Its tail lashed, dragging the Doctor with it. Tables scattered as it came to meet the lumbering Badger avatroid.

Badger seized hold of one of the heavy dining tables. It upended the object and advanced using it as an armoured shield. The table's legs flailed helplessly.

The catafalque hissed like an angry fish-kettle. Its tail coiled right round the Doctor, lifting him into the air.

'No, Badger!' he yelled.

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The avatroid raised the struggling table above its head and hurled it straight at the furious funerary carriage.

It smashed apart against the prow of the bier. The carved beasts barked and snarled their rage. The catafalque bellowed and lifted its tail to hurl the Doctor back in answer.

'Go on, then,' the Doctor shouted. 'Do your worst to me. It won't change anything! Go on!'

Every door in the House slammed in one clap of thunderous fury.

'Sorry,' moaned Chris on the balcony and slumped to the floor.

The tail stopped and the rumbling in the House began to diminish. The statue beasts froze.

Badger climbed up the bier and helped the Doctor struggle out of the coiled tail. He slid down and faced the Drudge that was waiting below.